Day 5 of 365: Royal Guard

These guys were so well designed it was ridiculous. When I was a kid I was mesmerized by these menacing figures clad in the brightest red possible. That red! I was sure these guys were the biggest badasses in the galaxy. I mean, they protected the Emperor, so logic would dictate that these guys would be able to hold their own against any threat. However, in the original trilogy we never get to see these guys fight. Nothing. They just stand. It was the biggest let down to young Ian. So I waited. I waited for several years, then I waited through two films of complete garbage. Then, finally, a third film of garbage. What could save this garbage? Are those Royal Guards? Yes! I guess at this point they wouldn't be "Royal" Guards, but they looked the same so it worked just as well. And, oh shit, they are going to fight Yoda! And then. . . What? Really? That is it?

Now I don't like to remember much of the garbage trilogy just like how I don't like to remember food poisoning or dental work but I remember being extremely excited and then whatever the emotion is when you find out the truth about Santa. Thanks for killing a part of my inner child, George.

- Ian

Edit: I just found this on Wookieepedia about the "Red Guard" from the garbage trilogy:

"As they were formed at Palpatine's discretion without a formal act, several senators (including Bail Organa) considered them to be illegal, and even the Jedi High Council were unsure of their true number and strength. Palpatine justified their creation due to rumors of corruption amongst the Senate Guard, especially after the infamous Ronhar Kim incident. During the hunt for Darth Sidious, Mace Windu and Yoda suspected that the Dark Lord of the Sith might be among their number."

Sadly, this would not be the first time Yoda was wrong.

1 comment:

  1. i think they don't fight as they are very representative and their armour is very decorational. youre very right, they are designed so well it hurts.